Without Expectations, your life will be more enjoyable
What if you let go of expectations and enjoy life better?
In the last time the subject Expectation came up for me several times and I realized there is not much awareness about this habit.
I thought to write about, to increase awareness and maybe help to make your life more enjoyable.
How much of your stress, anger, your mood, and your disappointments come from one thing?
Also, Read about confusing Hope with Expectation
Almost everything depends on your expectations. And if the outcome is not as you expect, you react with disappointment or anger.
“Expectation is the root of all heartache.”― William Shakespeare
The road to disappointment is paved with expectation. – Unknown.
Get aware of the expectations you have
In our minds, we have expectations about what other people should do, how our lives should look like, how others should behave, how the spouse, the friend, the customers, the boss should behave best.
But this is not a reality. it is our desire and imagination how it should be.
Everyone has his own feelings, thinking, and imagination.
It is also a kind of egoism when expecting others to be and do what we want.
“We judge others according to our image of perfection as well, and naturally they fall short of our expectations.” Miguel Ruiz
Think of all the expectations you have for yourself, your life, your partner, your children, your job, the world.
A cause of a bad relationship is the unfulfilled expectations partners have from each other.
If your marriage is just a bundle of expectations about how to extract happiness out of someone who should make heaven for you, you will be disappointed – Sadhguru
Expectation feeds frustration. It is an unhealthy attachment to people, things, and outcomes we wish we could control; but don’t.-Steve Maraboli
Thinking of my last article about the law of attraction one of the causes it does not work is the expectation the good comes to us right the way we imagine it. But it is not that way, the universe has its own ways to deliver, we have to be aware of the signs and act to it.
There are so many disappointments and miseries coming from expecting things from others or the world.
There is a simple solution.
Let go of expectation, imagine throwing them in the sea, a river, the ocean, and let them be swept away by the waves.
I love water 🙂 Read my post The story of the Little Water Spring and a Rock or Little Melbas Journey to the Ocean
Release them, and now you live without your expectations. I know it is not that easy but there is still time left until the new year. Most people make new years resolutions and the best would be to live without expectation. Still, time to practice and get aware of what we expect and instead accept what is now. Life will be much more enjoyable.
What is life like without expectations?
“Serenity comes when you trade expectations for acceptance”-Gautama Buddha
Accept reality as it is. Accept people as they are, not as you think they should be.
See things as they are. Be no longer disappointed, frustrated or annoyed
If you are getting aware, accept then let go of whatever you expect.
Remember for relationships:
“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.”
– Bruce Lee
If you love someone, set them free. And if they come back they’re yours; if they don’t they never were.- Richard Bach
This does not mean you have to agree with everything. You do your best and what you think is right. But do not expect anything from the people around you. Only we are responsible for our life, what we think and do. Only rely on yourself do not expect.
How To Enjoy Life Better Without Expectations
Try it and live without expectations, make an experiment.
If you do something good, Do not expect praise or recognition for your doing. If you give, give freely.
“A gift is pure when it is given from the heart to the right person at the right time and at the right place, and when we expect nothing in return. But when it is given expecting something in return, or for the sake of a future reward or a specific type of sentiment in return, the gift is of Rajas (impurity).-Bhagavat Gita
Do not expect traffic-free roads or the bus or train to be on time.
While shopping, do not expect to get to the checkout quickly.
Don’t always expect your partner to be friendly and relaxed and stand by to do what you want.
Pay attention to your thoughts and feelings. Do not condemn yourself if you have expectations.
Just take it easy and if you catch yourself expecting, and do not worry.
Better you accept what is and let go.
Get aware of your expectation, breathe deeply and accept what happens
Notice and be aware of your thoughts when others do not behave as you think they should.
Whenever you get aware of your expectations, take a deep breath, and let go.
I practice this for a long time. Expectations may come up sometimes, but whenever I notice I let go.
Whatever comes to me, good or bad, I take it as an opportunity to learn.
Whenever praise, a smile, a kind word, come to me, it is like a beautiful gift.
Try it at least for one day. You will see it is not that difficult.
Practice, there may be good opportunities during the holiday season 🙂
Be aware, it is just your perspective, your notion of how something should be. No more.
Start to enjoy Life better without expectations and keep a positive mind 🙂
To your Happiness 🙂
What is your opinion? Do you have experience with expectations?
Please leave a comment and tell us about your experience.
Download my free e-book > Let The Sunshine In Change your thoughts brighten your Day and feel good about yourself Affirmations and insights to think about and learn to change our thoughts and perception which can change our life. May it help you to have a more positive outlook 🙂
Hi Erika mam, yes it is true when we expect something and it doesn’t happen we feel bad and get frustration which is not good for health. Good idea 2017 with no expectations.
Hi Sazia,
I do not know why you landed in my spam folder.
it was not like this before?
Yes ,Sazia ,if we are able not to have expectations ,
disappointment and frustration will disappear.
Maybe try it and write about the health benefit 🙂
Thank you
Erika
Hi Erika,
Inspiring post! Letting go of expectations is not always easy to do, but if you want to live a much happier life, it is something you must try to do and your wonderful tips will help! Thanks for sharing 🙂
Hi Joan,
you are right ,it is not always easy ,but we can at least try to have less expectation.
Let them go whenever we get aware , at least it makes us think about and have less disappointment.
Thank you for your comment
Erika
Thank you. It is amazing that I picked your post on expectation. I was think what you have nicely described on your post. Without going into what happened yesterday, your post have really touched some of the areas I needed to deal with. Expecting so much from others is the root to disappointment and you are right. We all need to accept people the way they are and not turn them to what we think they should be. This goes for every mum out there, our kids will always be who they are nomatter what. Our part is to nurture them same thing goes for relationship we are in.
Hi Amaka,
I am glad this post came to a good time for you.
You are right Mums have often to deal with this as well.
We have to accept and let our kids be like they are and others
as well . Good if we sometimes think of our own childhood and
the expectations which made us feel not worthy enough.
Yes, let us nurture them and change our view of things
whenever we get aware of our expectations.
Thank you for sharing your experience
Erika
Hi Erika,
I like your real world examples of releasing expectations. Because it is easy for me to nod at your post and idea, but when you get specific I think of myself rushing to the train in NYC or getting annoyed when we are delayed at the airport. Expecting can really destroy your happiness. And when you let go expectations you can become genuinely happy no matter what happens. I dig feeling the moment itself, without trying to squeeze anything out of it. Being married to the moment and nothing else. Well, except my wife LOL.
Awesome post 🙂
Ryan
Hi Ryan ,
I can imagine you can nod on some of the ideas 🙂
And I can see you rush to the train ,but this is
how we can practice and get calmer. The delay aT the
airport reminds me of a story which I may write about
next time. There are people who really mastered it.
We will never see them very stressed ,it is all our thinking.
If you dig for the feeling you may have experienced it.
A state of bliss? This is what is called Sat Chit Ananda.
Being blissful in the moment a natural state of being 🙂
Even more pleasant if enjoyed together with your wife 🙂
Most people lost it these days.
I wish for you to know this state 🙂
Thank you for sharing your thoughts
Erika
Hey Erika,
Living a life without expectations is like an unfetter experience. Commonly expectations create fear because they cause us to have certain ideals about our desires and outcomes. Without expectations, we are free to fellow our desires. Without expectations, we no longer need hope and don’t need to wish for something to happen for us. Eventually, thanks for sharing your wonderful thought with us.
With best wishes,
Amar kumar
Hi Amar ,
Expectation can cause fear ,especially expectations others have from us,
like a boss or parents and partners, for example. But never give up hope.
Hope is different ,hope is something we need in life. Expectations are
thoughts we have in our mind , how we want something to be or behave.It comes from the ego.
But hope is something we can believe in, in a divine force, it has no pictures
or shape like expectation. A big dream only can come true with the help of the divine.
If you know exactly how to get to a goal ,this is not a dream ,a dream is if you need
the help of the universe .If you have hope it feels good ,hopelessness does not .
Never give up hope.
Thank you for your thoughts.
Erika
Hey Erika,
We all dream about something. The expectations really hurt when couldn’t get fulfilled. The life is precious and it’s important to enjoy every day.
You have mentioned some interesting points here. The life without expectations can be amazing.
I would love to have some goals for the new year.
Thanks for sharing with us.
~Ravi
Hi Ravi ,
yes, life without expectations can be pleasant.
It is a process to learn it. If you can start
and be aware of your expectation and do not
let yourself get disappointed by expectation
of others from you and learn to deal with this
Life will be easier. The important thing is to
be aware of it.
Thank you for your comment.
Erika
Hi Erika,
My experience with expectations has taught me to either have realistic ones based on proof or none at all. Most disappointments can be traced back to unmet expectations. You end up building something in your mind and then when it doesn’t happen you’re crushed. Many times our expectations are too high or unrealistic, as if we expect other people to just know what without being told.
I try not to expect too much, so I’m not let down but yet I can still be amazed at times.
~Lea
Hi Lea,
yes, it is right we better are realistic and try not to expect from others.
It is true we build things in our mind this is what we have to get aware of.
I think it is natural our mind is constantly producing thoughts and pictures,
but we can be aware of them and choose what is real and use our reasoning mind.
Best is only expect from ourselves to do what we decide and use our will to do it.
Expectations from anybody else can bring disappointment.
Thank you for your insights
Erika
Hi
It is very nice article to read and i like this. Thank you for sharing this wonderful idea to us
Have a nice day
God bless you
Hi Vikas,
I am glad you liked the post and hope it
did bring you insights.
Thank you
Erika
Hi Erika,
I would say that expecting something and waiting for that is dangerous because it will bring frustration in our life and it will spoil our health life. Not expecting anything will bring happier to live, but it is tough for us to be like that. My kind suggestion is we don’t want to wait for more if we expect less it will reduce our disappointment and pain because expecting nothing in the life will not bring any hope and happiness in our life
Hi Satish,
You are right it can be tough to be aware of expectations.
Expecting is different than hope. You always can hope.
It means expecting from others to do what you want or what you
think is right or how they have to behave.
The same is if anybody else expects you think, do ,behave how they
want. This is what brings disappointment. If somebody expects from
you to do something you do not like ,it feels not good, does it?
But if you do something freely for somebody it feels good .
Never give up hope and be aware of expectations.
Thank you
Erika
how they want.
Hello Erika! O loved this post, Yes I will let go of expectations in 2017 and throw them in the ocean!!
Great Post…
THANK YOU
Chery :))
Hi Chery,
It may be not easy first, but it will help to
have less disappointment. If somebody loves to
do something for us he does it anyways and it
is like an unexpected gift. And we can give this
gifts as well.
Thank you
Erika
Hello Erika, I am not sure as to why but this post of yours really got me thinking. I did find the need to come back tonight and read this again, thane the best part, to find your awesome comment to mine. Wow so true unexpected gifts given and received, this is so what this season is all about HUH? Thanks you again for sharing.. Chery :))
Hi Chery,
good it got you thinking. It is something we do not realize
that expectations bring disappointment. Not only, if we expect
something from others, also if others expect from us.The same
if it is about things. To be aware of this , makes it easier to deal
with expectations. Let things come to us like a gift:) who does not
like gifts?
Have a great holiday time.
Thank you
Erika
Love the quote, Erika! I love Dr. Steve Maraboli: Expectation feeds frustration. It is an unhealthy attachment to people, things, and outcomes we wish we could control; but don’t. He always gets right to the heart of things, doesn’t he?
Expectations truly do lead to disappointment. When I was young, I really expected for people to treat me the way I treated them or to respond the way I would respond. I had to learn that each human being has free choice and most of the time, they will choose differently than I would in their circumstances. And, that’s okay!
December is a great time to discuss “expectations.” The holidays, and spending time with family and friends can cause major issues if we have expectations about gifts, time set aside for family and friends, and commitments.
Thank you, Erika!
Hi Deborah,
yes, Dr. Steve Maraboli is always saying it right in a mindful way.
It is good you could learn and know this, is it not much easier and
more peaceful to live this way ? Yes, December brings in some families
more disappointment than love, expectations can do this. Better to let
go of them and enjoy the gifts freely given .
Thank you for sharing your experience.
Erika
Hi Erika
I do agree and this is what I preach to my friends and loved ones. Instead of creating unrealistic expectations, it is best to learn from our mistakes and live life to the fullest. Thank you so much for this inspiring post. Take care
Hi Ikechi,
you are right and I am sure you get them to make it better .
You are good in this things. It is much more pleasant to live
not expecting from each other and what we give or do with love
and without “have to’s” makes both sites feel good 🙂
Let you light shine 🙂
Thank you
Erika
Hi Erika,
What a beautiful article.
Replace expectation with Acceptance.
It sounds so simple.
It is.
But practicing it, inhaling your expectations and exhaling them away… letting them go… a powerful exercise that will surely change your life if you turn it into a habit.
-Donna
Hi Donna ,
it sounds simple, but may not be easy for some people.
Good is, if we are aware of our expectations and do what
you suggested. It is powerful and makes life more pleasant.
Thank you for your comment.
Praying for you and David ,sending god energy
I wish you good news 🙂
Erika
Hi Erika
Very thought provoking post indeed.
Our disappointment is the main outcome of our over-expectations. Those who expect what they really deserve never disappoint and enjoy their every achievement howsoever tiny it is.
First deserve then desire is the main principle one has to follow and be happy on what he really deserves after achieving it.
Many thanks for sharing this very thoughtful post.
Hi Mi Muba ,
Good, I found your comment in the spam folder
Nice to see you here.
You are right expectations bring disappointment
because often the outcome is not like we want it.
WE may expect from ourselves or hope of the universe,
but better not expect from others as we can not always meet
what others expect of us. Everybody has different thoughts and feelings
about things. It is good to think about and realize when we have expectations
it makes it easier to deal with it.We all deserve the best but the best comes not
always like we expect it.
Thank you for your visit
all the best
Erika
Hello Erika,
We wait for 2017! to worms well come. in this Time your post gives different insights with nice words.
Thanks for sharing
Hi Suresha,
I wish you all the best for your Newbie blog.
thank you
Erika
Phew! I am here again. I used the thought from this post. I had a situation on expectation. I quoted straight from my reading of this post. Thank you.
It is amazing how things we read bring itself up when we are in a related situation.
Wow, that was certainly a different take on expectations! But you – and the others – are absolutely correct. I hadn’t thought about the fact that I don’t have a lot of expectations anymore, but when I do, they do drive me crazy. Here’s to no expectations in 2017!
Hi Dee,
We do not think often about this, but it is a truth.
Good, you realized that you do not have a lot of expectations.
If we are really aware of this we are able to handle it better
and avoid disappointment. Take whatever good is coming as a gift.
Thank you and have a great Holiday and start in the New Year
Erika
Hi Erika,
It is a human nature that we live with expectations. The more we love others the more we expect from them. Sometimes our expectation go too high that it can ruin the relationship also. Living without expectation is really not easy as since birth we are habitual of that.
I must say you have real nicely pointed how life is better without expectations. I cannot promise that I cannot expect anything, but still I will try to expect as less as I can.
Thanks.
Hi Gaurav, I did find your comment in spam not sure why
You are right expectations are Human nature. But it is not
like this that we expect more the more we love. True love has
not conditions, think about. It is right expectation is
very dangerous for a relationship and a cause for separation.
This is why I am writing about to make aware of this habit and
habits can be changed. It needs awareness and the will to change it
and make the life more pleasant. If you are aware of it ,you are able
to deal better with it .Try it
Thank you
Erika
Thank you for this motivational post. Yes it is true when we expect something and if it doesn’t happen we feel bad and get frustration which is not good for health. Good idea with no expectations.
Hi Saurabh,
you are welcome; I am glad you liked it.
It is right unfulfilled expectation bring frustration, disappointment. We can get discouraged and depressed if
we can not fulfill or somebody does not fulfill ours. The expectation is the number one killer of good relationships.
Blame, guilt, and low self-esteem can come from it. Expectation is always attached to somebody
or something. But hope is not, there is no one to blame and we continue hoping.
Thank you for your comment.
To a successful year 2017 for you and your family
Erika
Hi Erika
I liked this part of your post – live without expectations Just live and give without expecting more.
“A gift is pure when it is given from the heart to the right person at the right time and at the right place, and when we expect nothing in return. But when it is given expecting something in return, or for the sake of a future reward or a specific type of sentiment in return, the gift is of Rajas (impurity).-Bhagavat Gita
Loved the post!
Hi Kathryn,
I am glad you liked the post.
To be aware of expectation and try to accept others as they are
and give without expecting something in return makes life more
pleasant.
Thank you for your comment
Erika
Hi, its true when we expect something and it doesn’t happen we feel bad and get frustration which is not good for health. we have go ahead without any expectation.
You are right, Dhaval Parmar
Better to take responsibility for our life and not expect from others or the way we want things to happen.
It is much easier to go with the flow of life and has less disappointment without expectations.
Thanks for your comment
Erika
A suggestion 🙂 if you put social share buttons on your website,it can be shared easier.
You have picked a favourite topic of mine! I have always said that we should not have expectations and if we don’t then everything is a bonus, you can’t be disappointed if you don’t expect anything.
Enjoy the journey!
Hi Mandy,
Good to know it is a favorite topic for you.
As I saw many have different perceptions about
expectation and is often misunderstood. You are
right, if something comes to us unexpected it is like a gift.
Thanks for your comment
Erika
Hi Erika,
Nice article. But isnt it so tough to let go of expectations in life. I mean that is what keeps us alive and allows us to look forward to achieve something.
Yes, over-expectation is what we have to let go, we should now what is within our reach I feel.
Thanks.
Praveen
Hi Praveen,
It seems many confuse expectations with hope 🙂
Read my post about hope. The expectation is programmed disappointment,
whether we expect or somebody else expects from us. It makes unfree.
It is Hope that we never should give up and keeps us move forward.
Thank you for your thoughts and comment
Erika