What can hold you back?
Do you use all your strength when you are sometimes on the verge of giving up and feeling miserable because you haven’t achieved your goals? Don’t give up too quickly. If you momentarily lose sight of your dream doesn’t mean all is lost.
If you realize that you cannot achieve your goals on your own, seek help. Many think it is a failure when they cannot do something independently. But asking for support shows real strength.
“Ask for help. Not because you are weak. But because you want to remain strong.”-Les Brown
We can choose thoughts that complicate things, like believing that we must do something with our own power.
We also can choose thoughts that put us in harmony with the power of the Universe to help us.
When you want something, all the Universe conspires in helping you achieve it.- Paulo Coelho
Here is a story that may help.
A small boy and his father were going for a walk. They came upon a great big rock in the middle of the road.
The little boy asked his dad, “Do you think I could move that rock if I tried really, really hard?”
His dad said, “I believe that you could move that rock just fine if you used all your strength.”
The little boy got down and pushed his shoulder against that rock. He tried and pushed but couldn’t move the rock. Finally, he turned to his dad and said,
“You were wrong; I can’t move that rock.”
His father said, “No, son, I said that you could if you used all your strength. Part of your strength is in asking me to help.”
Thinking into limitations means you have to do it all on your own.
Thinking into possibility means you ask for higher help.
Often this help comes in the form of Ideas or something, or somebody shows up at the right time. But we have to be aware and recognize it. And asking others for help is not a weakness.
Why is it challenging for many to ask for help?
Some people find it difficult because they think it is a sign of weakness. On the other hand, others lack the necessary social skills or do not know whom to ask. So, in the end, they face their problems alone. Some people even prefer to fail.
For some people, limiting beliefs make it difficult to ask for help.
Many people believe that it is wrong to take someone else’s time and that they have better things to do than deal with the problems of others. This belief is widespread and leads people to distance themselves from others.
Sometimes you think everything should happen immediately, and you want to do everything by yourself. Sometimes you would sit for hours fixing a problem that others would have solved in ten minutes. Sometimes it makes so much more sense to ask someone for help than to try to do everything yourself.
Whether you’re asking advice from an expert, a friend, or co-workers to help you with a project that could benefit your career, it’s okay to ask for help. Everybody is good at something; you know what suits you and what doesn’t.
Humans are social beings. Hence, one of our most significant advantages is that we can help one another. However, some people are unable to ask for help.
Everyone goes through tough times in the course of their life. However, some people find it very difficult to ask for help. The causes for this are different, but the consequences are the same. Without help, we get stuck and cannot move forward.
The inability to ask for help is related to low self-esteem because a person with low self-esteem underestimates their own needs and often puts other people’s needs before their own.
People with low self-esteem are often very hard on themselves and interpret their need for help to confirm their inferiority or weakness.
Avoiding responsibility is another reason some people believe they don’t need to ask for help. They think that other people should offer support when they are struggling. One excuse is not to afford to get professional help and are not willing to invest in themselves and rather stay dependent. Responsibility means not blaming others.
Pride is one of the main reasons people find it difficult to ask for support. It is highly satisfying to do things yourself. Overcoming obstacles on your own is an endorsement, but it’s also a double-edged sword. Especially if one fails at a task, pride makes it easy to blame others for lack of support.
Negative experiences are also a reason not to ask for help
Sometimes people find it difficult to ask for assistance because they have been disappointed in the past. If you’ve asked for help before and then your request was denied, it is less likely that you will try again in the future.
Fear of rejection
Another reason is the fear of rejection. Some are afraid that other people will not help them. They do not deny themselves the right to ask for help but rather deny other people the right to accept or turn away this request. If this is the case for you, you may find it challenging to understand this right, and you may feel confused if you get a negative answer.
But remember that helping other people isn’t always a burden. On the contrary, when we help others, it feels good and increases our well-being.
Trust others. Believe in other people’s good intentions and honesty. Believe that they will be open even if they can not help you.
Be generous. Appreciate it if you get the support that helps you to move on.
If you have a hard time using all your strength to ask for help, you will feel pretty lonely. You will distance yourself from other people, making it difficult for them to get to know you. You may get demotivated, feel stuck not reaching your goals, and give up.
But remember: Don’t be shy about asking for help. It doesn’t mean you’re weak, it means you’re wise.
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